Defeating the Odds Page 14

  Speaking of Damon… I load up the Hi-Talk app and send him an instant message.

  Ford18: Hey, babe. You there?

  HotHeadV: Yeah, just climbed out of the shower.

  Ford18: Now that is something I wanna see in person. How did today go?

  How can a man affect me so much? My heart skips a beat at the thought of seeing him looking freshed faced. I wonder what he smells like?

  HotHeadV: It was actually a meeting with my coach. To be considered for early release, I have to meet with Noble.

  Ford18: Bollocks. How do you feel about that?

  HotHeadV: To be honest, I’m not sure. Apparently, he would be classed as my main trigger. What if I blow up? I’ll ruin any chances of getting out of here early.

  Ford18: I get what you mean, but I truly believe that you will stay calm. Baby, just think of me. Maybe take something with you that reminds you of me. Keep it in your pocket. When are you meeting him?

  HotHeadV: No idea. I guess the coach and doc will set that up. I wish you could be here to meet him with me.

  Ford18: Me too. I will always be with you. Fuck, I sound like a girl, lol.

  Love. Lust. Desire always makes you sound like a fucking marshmallow.

  HotHeadV: Nah, you don’t. You just want to support me. Maybe I can see if Sam is around to go with me.

  Ford18: SAM? Again with fucking Sam! Tell you what, why don’t you just have him be there with you for every-fucking-thing. Clearly you don’t need my support as much as I thought.

  HotHeadV: Whoa, where the hell is that coming from? Sam is my best friend in here. SHE was the one that told me to talk to you. I do need you and your support.

  Ford18: Fuck! You never mentioned before that Sam was a chick. I assumed it was a bloke. Sorry :(

  I feel like shit for blowing up and accusing him without asking. That is how much he means to me. The ugly green guy rearing his head and causing trouble. I take a deep breath and wait for his reply. Fuck knows if he will forgive me for my outburst.

  HotHeadV: I get it. I’d feel the same if you were talking about some guy. But you can trust me, Ford. One thing I hate is cheaters.

  Ford18: Me too. Fuck, I feel like crap now, D. I do trust you. I just let the thoughts in my head win for a split second.

  HotHeadV: Hey, don’t worry about it. You can make it up to me once we’re out of rehab.

  Ford18: Speaking of getting out, I had better go and see what the doc says about me getting out early. Otherwise, you will be using your hand until I get out of here. ;)

  HotHeadV: My hand is getting tired ;) Go see the doc. Talk to you later x x

  I sign off and shut the laptop down. I scrub my hands over my face and take the walk over to Doctor Wilks’s office. Might as well get this over with. Spencer is walking towards me with a smile on his face. God, this man is fucking gorgeous. What a shame that he does nothing for me.

  “Hey, man. How are you doing?” he asks. I smile at him as we walk side by side, our strides matching because of our height.

  “I’m good, mate, really good. I am on my way to see the doc. I wanna know if I can get out early. You guys have been a great help to me. I have some conditions for my early release, so we shall see.” I see the concern on his face when I look at him. Spencer has become a great friend in here. We have spoken about pretty much everything that I have talked to the doc about. He even listened to me when I talked about Damon. He knows my worries, but he thinks that being with Damon will have a positive impact on me.

  “Is that wise, Ford? I know that you’re doing great, but are you sure you are ready?”

  “I am. I need this, Spence. I need Damon.” He nods his head as we stop outside the office that holds my fate.

  “Good luck. Come and find me later and let me know what is happening.” I nod my head and knock on the door. She doesn’t leave me waiting.

  “Come in.” I twist the handle and push the door open. Doctor Wilks is sitting behind her desk, tapping away on her computer. She lifts her head and smiles at me.

  “Hello, Ford. what can I do for you?” I walk over and sink into the seat in front of her.

  I take a deep breath and explain everything that Damon and I discussed.

  “I would like to know if I can get an early release. I know that I am only half way through my treatment, but I feel like I have found myself while I have been in here. I have you, Spencer, Cleo and Damon to thank for that. I know now how much I messed up, and I can never do that again. The betting isn’t worth losing the people that mean something to me.” I watch her closely as she listens. My breathing is heavy, and my anxiety is climbing the proverbial ladder.

  “Well, I can see a huge difference in you, Ford, and I am very impressed. But do you honestly think that when you leave here you won’t get the urge to place a bet?”

  “I really do. I will have Damon.” I leave it at that. She smiles at me and nods her head.

  “I like that you have formed a friendship with him. It was a huge step for you to forgive him for that night, even though it wasn’t his fault that you lost the money.” I can only nod my head, because she is right.

  “I know. He has helped me deal with so much. I am not afraid to go public about my sexuality, as long as I have Damon by my side.” She raises an eyebrow at me and I shrug.

  “Okay, I am a little worried about how people will react, but if my teammates’ reactions are anything to go by, then I should be fine. I am not delusional in thinking that everyone will accept me, but I won’t focus on them. Only the positive in my life. And that is Damon, my family and my team.”

  “Okay. Let me look over everything that we have done, and I will review things. I can let you know by tomorrow.”

  “One more thing that may help with your decision. Damon and I plan on hiding out for a few weeks. Getting to know each other better before going public with my sexuality and our relationship.”

  “Thank you, Ford. That is definitely something to think about. I will let you know about my decision when I reach it.” I nod my thanks and leave the office, heading to my room to change into gym clothes. I need to work out. My muscles are bunched up and I need to release the tension.

  I chance a look at my laptop and see that Damon has sent me a message via Hi-Talk. I chuckle when I see the message of good luck and telling me that he hopes that I like the picture. I click on the attachment and wait patiently for the image to load. I quickly jog to the door and close it. I don’t want anyone to see what photo he has sent me. The photo loads and there he is.

  Damon Vardy, the man I am pretty much falling in love with.

  He is laying back on his bed, one arm up and behind his head. His man-bun is tied up. His bicep bulging and begging to be licked. My cock jerks in my jeans at the sight. The smirk on his face tells me that he knows this photo will get my dick hard. I drag my eyes from his face and look at his chest. The tattoos stand out against his skin.

  I take in his perfect abs that I will definitely be licking and biting. I pop open the button on my jeans and pull down the zipper. I carefully pull my shaft out of my boxers and start to slowly pump up and down.

  What the fuck is this man doing to me?

  I look lower and see the sheet is resting low enough that I can see the base of his huge cock. My hand moves faster and faster, until my balls tighten, and I come all over my stomach. My pants fill my little room. I close my eyes and let the euphoria take over my body. If he can do this to me without laying a finger on me, then he will make me light up when he actually touches me.

  Bring on early release and some sexy time with Damon ‘Hot Head’ Vardy.

  Here I am, day forty-nine, and I am anxiously awaiting my meeting with Noble. I’m sat in the communal area, sipping on a raspberry herbal tea, wishing it was coffee.

  “Damon.” I look up and Will is walking towards me, holding an envelope. “This came for you this morning.”

  “Thanks.” I place my cup down in front of me on the small coffee table. I tu
rn the package around in my hands, wondering who would be sending me something. That’s when my eyes catch the return address: Woods Lake Recovery. A smile covers my face as I rip the small box open. A small blue ball falls out, along with a note. I give the ball a squeeze and realize it is a stress ball.

  Damon,

  Hope this helps you with your visit today. I’ll be thinking of you.

  Ford x x

  “Damon, we’re ready for you.” Dr. Shilcott smiles at me as he lingers in the doorway. Shit, I don’t have time to send Ford a thank you message. At least I got to speak to him briefly this morning. He’d been surprisingly awake this morning; already dressed in workout gear. I can’t wait to see him on the field with his team.

  I take a deep breath and climb to my feet. I slowly walk out of the common room and down the hallway to the doctor’s office. My hands begin to tremble. I am so scared that I will blow up as soon as I see him. I shove my hand in my shorts pocket and grab hold of the ball, which is the colour of Ford’s team. I squeeze it in my hand and feel relief, like he’s here with me.

  I push the door open and there he is; Noble, standing with his back to me as he looks out of the patio doors.

  “Come on in, Damon,” the doctor says. I am surprised to see that my coach is here too. That makes me feel a bit calmer.

  Noble turns around, and a smile covers his face. My heart rate picks up and my shoulders tighten from seeing him standing in front of me. He ambles closer and holds his hand out for me. I hesitate at first, but I need to make the effort.

  “Noble.” I nod my head at him as I shake his hand.

  “Come and have a seat, boys,” Coach says as he walks closer to me and puts a supportive hand on my shoulder.

  “Can I say something?” Noble asks, looking between the doctor and me. “Vardy, I just want to say that what I said in the ring about Livvy was a lie. She was never ashamed of you. She loved you so much. You were all she talked about. I’m sorry I said it.”

  I slump down in the closest seat and cover my face with my hands. I will the tears not to come. I knew that she loved me, but a part of me wondered if what he had said was right. I think that was why I was finding it so hard to let go.

  “Damon, tell me how you’re feeling?” Dr. Shilcott asks. I look up and see he has his pen poised on his notebook.

  “I’m not going to lie. I feel a little worked up. He was engaged to my sister. He should have been able to protect her when I wasn’t there.”

  “Damon-” the doc starts, but Noble cuts him off.

  “No, he’s right.” Noble sits in the chair opposite me and rests his forearms on his knees. “I didn’t protect her the way I should have, and I’ve beaten myself up about it every single day since then. I should have done more.”

  “She died on impact. There wasn’t anything you could have done,” Coach adds.

  There is silence in the room for several minutes, until I speak.

  “Noble, I’m sorry I took it out on you. I had to blame someone, and you were the easiest target. I couldn’t accept the fact that she was gone. I always imagined us growing old together, spoiling her kids and watching her walk down the aisle.”

  “I get it, man, I do. You’re healing though, right?” he asks, concern etched on his face. This man was like family. He had spent every day with Olivia while they were together. He was like a brother, and I’m ashamed that I acted the way that I did.

  “Yeah. I’ve had counselling and I’m coming to terms with her death. I just hate that it took me so long. I’m sorry for how I treated you.”

  “It’s okay. Get yourself sorted and get back in that cage.” Noble climbs to his feet and heads towards the door. “It was good to see you, man.”

  “You too.” I stay sitting, and once he leaves, I let out a big sigh. “So? I did it. Does that mean I can leave now?”

  Wow, that was intense, Noble apologising. It bought everything back to me, all the emotions of losing my sunshine. It was a relief to know that she wasn't ashamed of me, that she loved me as much as I love her. It was another battle I had now fought, seeing Noble and keeping my cool. Maybe I was finally doing it, fighting my demons.

  All my focus is on Ford and getting him underneath me somewhere peaceful and quiet. A romantic getaway. Screw that, a sexy getaway.

  “Yes, Damon. You will be able to leave early. But I just need to talk to Dr. Tamer and your counsellor and make sure you’re in the right frame of mind.”

  “I am, Doc. I promise you, I am.”

  “Mr. Wilton, some of this decision will fall on you too. You were the one that wanted him in here. Are you happy for him to leave early?”

  “Well-” I cut Coach off.

  “I’m going to go away for a couple weeks, relax and have some fun. You won’t have to worry about me.”

  “I actually think that’s a great idea, Damon.” The doc smiles.

  “Coach?”

  “I think you’ve done great. You’ve made me proud, boy. Take some time to relax. You have a fight in eight weeks I need you ready for.” He slaps me gently on the back.

  “You can count on me, Coach.” I look back to the doc.

  “I’ll have a date through for you in a couple of days. Once Dr. Tamer and your counsellor has approved. In the meantime, make the most of the activities here.”

  “Will do. Thanks.” I shake the doc’s hand before leaving the room.

  I head back into the communal area and grab my laptop off the side of the sofa. I open it up and hit the Hi-Talk button. It’s nearly lunchtime, and I am sure Ford will be busy, but I want to see if he is around.

  HotHeadV: Hey, thanks for the present. Loved it. The visit went well.

  I wait for a couple of minutes but get no reply. I knew it was a long shot. I wish we had our mobile phones, then we would at least get notifications.

  “Hey, what you up to?” Will asks as he sits down next to me on the recliner sofa.

  “Not much. Was thinking about having a swim after lunch.”

  “I hear you may be leaving early?”

  “Yeah, I hope so. I’m ready to get out of here. I’ve learnt a lot about myself over the six weeks that I’ve been here.”

  “Are you sure you’re not rushing it?” He looks concerned.

  “Ah, look at you not wanting me to leave. You going to miss me?”

  “I’ll have an easier job without you here.” He chuckles. “Those first few days of your temper tantrums were not a laugh, I’ll tell you that.”

  “Yeah, sorry about that. I wasn’t in a good place. I needed to face up to a lot of stuff. I feel like I’ve finally accomplished that.”

  “And yoga.” He winks. “Told you that you’d love it.”

  “Yeah, it surprised me how calming it was once I got used to it. Coach even joked about me getting a yoga instructor.”

  “I think it’s a good idea.” He nods. “Come and say bye before you leave.” He nods his head at me once more before getting up and leaving me to my thoughts.

  I am fucking bouncing with excitement today. Doctor Wilks has informed me that I can get out of here early. I am going to keep the date of my release from Damon and surprise him when he leaves. I need to call in a few favours to get what I want, but it will be worth it. It will be worth seeing his face when we finally meet face-to-face.

  I walk out to the garden and spot Cleo sitting over by her favourite tree, sketchpad in hand and pencil skimming over the sheet of paper. She is in her zone today. I take the spot of grass next to her, but she doesn’t acknowledge me. She is too engrossed in her design. I lean over slightly to see what she is drawing, and I am amazed by her talent. She will do well at Castle Ink.

  “What are you doing?” I say, startling her.

  “Ahhhhhh! What the hell, Ford? You scared the crap out of me.” She places her tiny hand over her heart, calming her breathing down. I chuckle and pick up the book that she dropped. I take in the design and look at her, then back to the book.

  “This i
s fucking amazing, Cleo. How? You only met him once.” She has sketched Allen. The drawing is perfect, like he is actually in front of me. I flick through the pages and see other drawings of him, from different angles and with different backgrounds.

  “Holy shit. I knew you were good but these…” I leave the sentence hanging because I shit you not, no words will justify her talent.

  “You like them?” she asks.

  “Like them? Sweetheart, I love them. They are fucking epic. You will do just fine at Castle Ink, I can tell you that now. Dex and Jay are going to shit their pants when you arrive. They are looking forward to you joining them.”

  “What are they like? Men make me nervous, Ford. My uncle made sure of that.” I can actually see her body shrink in on itself when she brings up her uncle. I would love to come face-to-face with that fucker.

  “What did he do to you, sweetheart? I know it must have been bad.” I keep my distance. I know that when she is in this head space, she doesn’t like me touching her. “Tell me. You know you can trust me.”

  I watch as she takes a deep breath and sets her pencil down on the grass. As soon as her hand goes to her hair, I speak up.

  “Don’t. Don’t do it. Twirl the pencil in your hand if you have to. No more hair pulling. You are better than this. You cannot let him win anymore.” Her hand shakes, but she listens and reaches for the pencil.

  “It started when I was around eleven. He would touch me by accident. Well, he would say it was, anyway. I started developing early, as you can see.” She points to her boobs. I have seen bigger, but she has a great size. “Then he got braver. He made me touch him when he was babysitting one night. I was so scared, but he told me that he would get my dad fired from his job. I knew that money was tight, so I kept my mouth shut. The touching went on for a while. I lost count of the times he made me do it. The last time he touched me… he raped me. My parents came home early with a cousin who was staying with us. They arrived while he was finishing up. My father and my cousin beat the hell out of him. He ended up in the hospital.” Tears are streaming down her face, and I can’t not hold her anymore. I slip my arm around her and pull her tight to me. She tenses a little before finally relaxing, and I hold her while she cries.